Safire pulls a Finkelstein...There's a Republican political consultant named Arthur Finkelstein who rather famously spent the tail-end of his once-celebrated career consistently embarrassing himself and his clients by failing -- publicly and spectacularly -- to transform the endless incantation of phrases like, "LIBERAL, DANGEROUSLY LIBERAL, SCARILY LIBERAL," into a winning political strategy.

Today, William Safire attempts the same bit of political alchemy with regard to Democratic front-runners John Kerry and John Edwards -- and, not surprisingly, the results are every bit as cringe-inducing as Finkelstein's most ham-fisted efforts.

As Don Imus sometimes unkindly says, Jesus, it's time to pin a note on that guy's sweater and drop him off at the dog track.

POSTSCRIPT: John Edwards isn't asking anybody to guess where he stands on the issues; he's laid it all out in a detailed policy book called Real Solutions for America. If you haven't had a chance yet, read it here, and you'll quickly discover that John Edwards is, in fact, "MAINSTREAM, DANGEROUSLY MAINSTREAM, SCARILY MAINSTREAM." And that, folks, is a winning political strategy.